Cooties!

It'a been hot lately, so last night, like any respectable suburbanite, I was wearing shorts and watering the back lawn. It was dark, and when I knelt down to connect a hose, I felt weird things crawling on my bare leg. When I got to the light, I saw all manner of vermin on my leg.

I brushed myself off, found a flashlight, and went back to discover that I had in fact, knelt squarely on a dead squirrel. When they had the chance, all the squirrel's hungry creepy crawlies had transferred onto me.

I hope I don't come down with lyme disease or the bubonic plague.